


DiGiornos, Delivery and Desperate Measures

by BornofFlame



Series: Sanders Sides One Shots [56]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Pizza, Virgil is tired, digiornos, dominos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:41:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28421871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BornofFlame/pseuds/BornofFlame
Summary: So AdrianaInTheSnow has a comfort series of mine and so I wrote fanfic for it.  (Cuffed Universe)Anyway, there’s a running gag that Logan and Remus are the reason why Virgil keeps getting fired from deadend jobs.  So I wrote a bit with it.
Series: Sanders Sides One Shots [56]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1878814
Comments: 5
Kudos: 33





	DiGiornos, Delivery and Desperate Measures

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AdrianaintheSnow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdrianaintheSnow/gifts).



> enjoy!  
> -ky
> 
> ps: hi adirana, you're cool, i hope I did everyone justice:))))))

Virgil honestly had lost count at this point at how many jobs Logan and Remus had indirectly made him lose. Or directly in the case of the art shop and Target.

But nothing could go wrong with delivering pizzas for Dominos. _Nothing._ He’d been doing this for two weeks now and nothing had gone wrong, which was a bit of a record at this point and so when Virgil got a delivery slip for some place on the other side of the city, he thought it was weird, why order from this location when there was another Domino’s closer, but whatever.

Yeah, he was really wrong on that part.

…

Virgil rang the doorbell, as per the instructions on the receipt and when the door opened, he was greeted by a confused man.

“Dominos for Hatcher?”

The man blinked and Virgil sighed. “There was a pizza asked to be delivered here, can you just take them and sign the paper? They’ve already been paid for.”

“I think you have the wrong address.”

“Fuck.” Virgil turned away and the man’s hand clamped down on his shoulder before he could move away.

“Maybe you should come inside.”

“I’d rather fucking not.” Virgil responded as the man tugged him back.

He probably would have gotten away if he hadn’t been holding three pizzas. Unfortunately for Virgil, he was dragged inside and the door was slammed shut.

…

From the car that he had been in for the past day, Remus cursed. Virgil _really_ had the worst case of luck. He’d been watching this house to hopefully see a deal go down, after all, he’d been following this trail for a few weeks now, but now he had to add abducted pizza deliverer to the list.

…

Logan was pulling DiGiorno's out of his hideout’s oven after the first pizza that he ordered hadn’t shown up, which was aggravating, but he shouldn’t have trusted Dominos. Either way it didn’t matter, because he was heading out tomorrow morning to the next job he had. He didn’t have any plates here, so he opted to fold some paper towels and use that.

He was on his second slice when the doorbell rang. Logan got up with his pizza slice and meandered to the door, idly wondering if it was the Dominos order.

He opened the door.

“Remus. You said a forty two hour truce. I still have fourteen hours.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m not here to arrest you, scoot.” Remus pushed past him and entered the bare house, Logan closing the door as the officer made his way to the kitchen and stole a slice of pizza.

“Why are you here?”

“I was on a stakeout, mostly waiting out the truce time and I saw your dumbass of a ex boyfriend get pegged.”

Logan blinked. “I’ve never had an ex. Why are you watching porn at work?”

Remus sighed. “Oh my god, how are you somehow the smartest and the dumbest person I know? I was doing a stakeout, and I saw Virgil trying to do his job- he delivers pizzas now- and the person who ordered it dragged him inside and he’s probably still in there.”

Logan’s eye twitched. “Okay.”

“Wanna help me get him back?” Remus took a bite of Logan’s pizza and nodded. “This is good.”

“Why don’t you just arrest them?”  
“They technically haven’t done anything illegal yet, that’s why I was watching the place.”

“I can’t even come up with the words to describe what I want to do with you.”

“Kinky.”

“Nevermind, I want to acquaint your face with a chair. Repeatedly.” Logan muttered.

“Still kinky.”

…

“If I had a nickel for everytime I got tied up and locked in a closet, I’d have two nichels.” Virgil said cheekily as the nameless dude handcuffed him to a shelving unit.

“Shut up.”

“I mean like, you really didn’t have to drag me in here. I’m really tired of people getting me fired for doing my job.”

“I will not hesitate to gag you.”

Virgil shrugged. “You would not be the first.”

“Looks like I’ll be the first to make sure you don’t get out.”

Virgil froze. “Woah, hold up. I’ve been through some shit, please just let me go at the end. I’d really rather not die in a dusty closet. I won’t snitch.”

The man said nothing, but he shoved a handkerchief in Virgil’s mouth and then tied a rope around his head, effectively making it so he couldn’t work out the gag.

 _Remus would probably find this hot._ Virgil thought miserably as the guy left, shutting the door and throwing him into darkness.

…

When Remus and Logan pulled up a few houses away from the one that Virgil was apparently in, Logan sighed.

“Are you serious?”

“What?”

“I had a job over here.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” Remus thunked his head against the steering wheel. “I swear if we get Virgil fired again…”

“Our current problem is that we need to make sure that he’s fine. Minimum wage jobs aside, I move that we wait for them to leave, see if they take him with them and if not, we go in and search to see if he’s still there. If they take him, you can charge them with abduction and my job will be done.” Logan pulled out his most recent laptop as Remus looked at him incredulously.

“Aren’t you worried they’ll kill him, they’re drug dealers.”

Logan didn’t bother to look up. “No. I’ve been tapping money from these guys for a while, they usually just leave people behind to die of natural causes.”

“What.”

“I make sure they’re found before they die. I’m a criminal, not a monster Remus.” Logan snapped.

…

Virgil lost track of time, but he was dead exhausted by the time the closet door opened and he looked up to see Logan.

“Remus, found him!” Logan called out the door before turning and crouching in front of him. “Are you okay?”

Virgil glared and Logan blinked a few times before realizing why he couldn’t speak.

“Sorry. One moment.” he untied the rope and Virgil spat out the handkerchief.

“Why is it always you two?” He hissed out and Logan sighed.

“I am sorry that you keep getting caught up in our escapades.”

“I’m tired Logan. Really, really tired. Can you guys just unlock me and leave so I can go get fired again and also sleep. I don’t know how long I’ve been stuck here.”

“About a day.” Remus’ voice interrupted before Logan could answer as he crammed himself into the closet to crouch next to Logan. “Nice place you got here.”

“Remus.”

“What Lo? It’s better than some of the other places we’ve left and found Pizza Man.”

All three of them shuddered.

Remus reached forward with some sort of key, unlocking Virgil’s handcuffs and freeing him from the shelving. Virgil rubbed at his wrists and shook his arms to get some of the feeling back. 

“I didn’t even see either of you this time, how the fuck did this happen?”  
“Logan was stalking them.”

“Remus, you were here first. And to be honest, neither of us directly had a part in this. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

Virgil sighed and rested the back of his head against the shelf that he had been handcuffed to. “God, kill me.”

“I’d rather not. Do you need to be carried out?” Logan gently asked as he brushed a bit of Virgil’s hair from his face.

“Nah, I may be exhausted, but I should probably drive the Dominos car back to the place before I get charged with theft.” Virgil waved his hand, prompting Logan and Remus to stand and take a few steps back so he could get off the ground.

“I didn’t really like the blue anyway, but I’m not really ecstatic to have to go job searching again. I’m starting to run out of places that’ll hire me.”

And with that, he pushed past Logan and Remus, exiting the house and leaving the pair to stare at each other.

Remus scuffed at the floor with a toe. “So, uh… I’ll give you fourteen hours?”

Logan shrugged. “Sure. I’m going to make sure that Virgil gets home without falling asleep.”

“Okay. See you next time we inevitably cross paths and get Virgil fired again.”

Logan nodded, took a half step towards Remus, decided against whatever he was going to do and turned, leaving the officer to close the closet door.

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are nice! have a nice day:)


End file.
